1. If you could pick your neighbors (living, dead, real or fictional), who would live to your right, to your left, across from you and below you?
they really did start this meme off with the difficult nonsense. huh. k. to my right would be Jinx, Gordon, Mike, and Max, and Katie all living together in a House of Constant Infectious Laughter - we'd get one of them going on something, and they'd keep laughing in a loop until the end of time. to my left - BATMAN. i think i'll put Toby Ziegler, from the West Wing, in the house across the street. and while i'm not sure what is supposed to be meant by "below" me, i'll assume it means in my basement - which i will fill with faeries of the classic, mischievous and unknowable sort.
2. Can you cook? If so what is your speciality?
erm. i can cook...certain things. my specialty is probably either my omelette or Kraft Mac-n-cheese. or grilled meats of all varieties. for reals, i know what spices to throw into those things to make them delicious. i'm really more of a sous-chef though - i dice, chop, blend, whisk, and stir like a pro.
3. What is your least favorite sound?
that's a tough one. i hate the sound of the brakes on a bus or other large vehicle when they've started to go. i can't stand to hear someone vomit, not so much the sound of the person as the sound of the vomit itself as it hits things. rust scraping against rust is pretty bad too. oh, and cell phone ring tones that don't sound like actual phone-bells, but also don't sound like the music they're trying to replicate! and people listening to obscenely loud music on the train when i'm trying to read - especially when the music itself is obnoxious!
4. Who was your favorite primary teacher, and have you seen him or her recently?
i'm going to take a little license with this one, since the authors of this "meme" are british, and i'm not sure precisely what is meant by "primary." by my 7th/8th-grade homeroom teacher, Flory, was among the best and most important teachers i've ever had. a really inspiring person to be around. i haven't seen her in years, but i did correspond with her last year, and though she's transferred to a different school, she seems to be doing very well there.
5. White shoes: "Any time of the year", "before Labor Day", "only in a sanatorium", or "what do you mean white shoes?"
only tennis-shoes should be white, and i only wear tennis-shoes when i exercise, which is an inherently private time for me. so only in private.
6. How many hours do you sleep, and how many do you really need?
i usually get 8 hours of sleep or so, though i really only need about six to function at full capacity during the day. i do keep an odd sleep-schedule though, owing to my not having a job, and only taking evening classes.
7. Have you ever met Kevin Bacon?
i punched a man who i thought was Kevin Bacon once...
8. What book is currently on your bedside table?
by any literal interpretation of the question, none. but i am reading "Temporarily Yours," which is an ethnographic study of San Francisco sex workers in the late '90s, as well as "The Burning City" by Niven and Pournelle - standard sci-fi-ish nonsense. the latter book is what i read before bed, so i guess it touches closer to the heart of the question.
9. What kind of dancer are you?
much like Mr. Gaiman, i am the kind who says "no I don't think so I'm afraid." unlike Mr. Gaiman, i tend to not mean it when i say that, and i tend to get coerced into doing the twist, like an idiot.
10. What's the coolest toy you had as a kid?
i had a bunch of electric train sets that i used to patch together to make a giant track around the floor of my room. i remember that was pretty neat.
11. If your life were a television show, would you be a reality show, sitcom, drama, game show, documentary, mini-series, after-school special or soap opera? How long do you think your show would run before it was cancelled?
documentary, hands-down. it would have some kind of contrived message about the search for meaning, or being scrupulous in an unscrupulous world, and would be directed by an unknown indie jackass no one had ever heard of. it would play on public access or not at all.
12. A restaurant has a special named after you. How does the menu describe it and how much does it cost?
"The Rook" is a blackened chicken with some kind of veggie side dish and some bread. it would cost $5.95 at some cheap city diner.
13. What do you have in your pockets?
at the moment i'm in my robe, so nothing. i really never have anything in my pockets when i'm indoors. however, hypothetically, were i to go outside, i would be carrying an old black leather Guess wallet, a little cash, my cell phone, my keys (or not if Caitlin's with me and has her keys), and a writing utensil of some kind.