theljparadox (theljparadox) wrote,


i have recently discovered the show "30 Rock," and it is brilliant.  however, notable though the rest of the show may be, it is nothing compared to Tracy Morgan's improv in the episode "Emmanuel Goes to Dinosaur Land:"

“I slept on a old dog bed stuffed with wigs!”

“I watched a old prostitute stab a clown!”

“Our basketball hoop was a ribcage!  A ribcage!!!

“Oh lord!  Some guy with dreds electrocuted my fish!”

“All my life I’ve tried to forget the things I’ve seen!  A crackhead breast-feeding a rat!  A homeless man cookin’ a Hot Pocket on the third rail of the G train!”

“I seen a blind guy bite a police horse!”

“A puppy committed suicide after he saw our bathroom!”

“I once bit into a burrito and there was a child’s shoe in it!”

“I seen a hooker eat a tire!”

“A pack of wild dogs took over and successfully ran a Wendy’s!”

“The sewer people stole my skateboard!”

“The projects I lived in were named after Zachary Taylor, generally considered to be one of the worst presidents of all time!”

“I once saw a baby give another baby a tattoo!  They were very drunk!”

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